28 June 2020
STRAIGHT & 2 BEERS
The oldest profession is adapting to a world ravaged by the pandemic
It is not for nothing that it is called the world’s oldest profession.
The phrase is frequently used as a euphemism for prostitution.
At the beginning of the national lockdown, a plea for sex workers to be allowed to operate and peddle their wares fell on deaf ears. Sex work, after all, remains illegal in this country. It is equivalent to selling or buying cigarettes and many prostitutes have borne the brunt of the law when found soliciting.
The profession did not qualify for the financial relief announced by the government during the national lockdown. Essentially, prostitutes are on their own.
However, the profession has proven its resilience, surviving wars and pandemics. Prostitutes were there during the two world wars and during the Spanish flu that hit the world in 1918.
COVID-19 has sparked fear and forced a change in behaviour globally. Social distancing is the new normal.
Prostitution, like other contact sports, is not encouraged.
So, how have the members of the oldest profession managed under these difficult times?
Straight & Two Beers sleuths discovered that while the ladies of the night have all but disappeared on Oxford Road in Rosebank, online is where the action is at.
The brothels may be closed and many sex workers struggling to pay the bills, but
others are working remotely from home.
Like it happened when the sale of liquor was forbidden under alert levels four and five, WhatsApp has become the platform for hook-ups.
Several WhatsApp groups have sprouted where the horny can set up an appointment for a quickie or a full-house session. I must mention that you have to be reckless enough or insanely horny to travel across town to bonk a stranger when human contact can lead to illness.
The more enterprising and health conscious prefer to avoid human contact altogether and provide only virtual sex. This includes the selling of nude pictures and videos, and even a video call to have online fun.
The oldest profession may be bruised and battered by the Coronavirus, but it is definitely not on the ropes and is gearing itself for more rounds.