The good, the bad and the ridiculous at this year’s Sona
The State of the Nation Address (Sona) is without a doubt the biggest social event on the political calendar. Hence politicians pull out all the stops to look dazzling and fly.
Unfortunately, some just can’t dress as well as they shout slogans.
It was especially shocking to see some lady politicians looking like they had covered their voluptuous selves with curtains donated by some dingy Chinese factory in Fordsburg. Eish, vele vele these MPs, despite their perks and pampering by the taxpayer, just don’t seem interested in hitting the gym? Lots of mafuthas there.
Perhaps it’s time the big man at Mahlamandlopfu subjects MPs to a rigorous wellness regimen.
But shame, Minister in the Presidency Khumbudzo Ntshavheni tried this time, in a flowing green dress that made her look at least 10 years younger.
Human settlements minister Thembi Nkadimeng, in a fawn shiny dress reminded Shwa of those choral music groups from back in the 80s. For a minute or two, Shwa thought she was there to serenade the overpaid MPs.
But we must all agree that IFP leader Velenkosini Hlabisa has the makings of a bishop presiding over a massive, popular church. But he killed it in a shiny grey suit and red tie that actually gave him that presidential look.
Shwa was wondering what on earth Congolese rumba legend Kofi Olomide was doing strolling on the red carpet. Had the king of rumba swapped his music career for politics on SA soil?
It was only on closer scrutiny that Shwa realised that, no man, this is actually one Papa Penny of Penny Penny fame. He looked like one of those Congolese skhothanes in a colourful blue sailor man’s suit with a touch of gold linings and matching kick-and-bobozas, which looked like they were designed by zama zamas. His hair, tied in a knot, made one wonder if this wasn’t perhaps some tool to counter loadshedding.
Meanwhile Papa Penny’s comrades in MKP decided to go for the military camouflage, looking like toy soldiers. Shwa thinks this outdated type of dress belongs in the 90s. It looks ridiculous. Especially when it’s worn by people who have never even as much as held a toy gun in
their lives.
But truth be told, Duduzile Zuma, the MKP owner’s daughter, looked somewhat smashing in dark glasses, camouflage cap, boots and all. Is she perhaps being prepared for a role as commander in chief of the MKP armed forces should they decide to go the M23 route and take their struggle to the bush one of these days.
Phophi Ramathuba, Limpopo’s finest premier, looked ravishing in her summer dress, and Shwa felt like iyooh, wa chesa moghel.
Sputla Majaivane, Shwa’s favourite minister of electricity, doesn’t disappoint at all.
He rocked up with a cool suit, and as always, he kept on smiling, making Moi salivate.
Iyooh mara Stella Ndabeni-Abrahams showed up with a dress that looked like a curtain that she removed from her sliding door at home. What was that thing you were wearing mara Stellarated?
Cupcake’s imbongi, Inako Mateza, who is 19 years old, knew her job for the day as she dazzled the red carpet in her Xhosa traditional attire. You go, gal. Shwa is proud of you.
Former Free State premier Mxolisi Dukwana looked like he was inspired by the great Nelson Mandela, as he rocked the Madiba Shirt and Crocket & Jones.
Duks thought he was going to the classroom to teach as he used to way back before he became a politician, lol.
Shwa had a ball at Sona.
