Buying a home is one of the biggest financial decisions anyone will ever make in the course of their lives, but many couples quickly discover that they don’t see eye to eye on money.
René Roux, general manager for client and intermediary engagement at Sanlam, said they have developed a money personalities artificial intelligence tool to help people understand how their upbringing, habits and character influence the way they handle money.
The tool identifies seven financial personalities, from the cautious prepared protector who values savings and security to the ambitious high-stakes achiever who thrives on calculated risk.
“Buying a house is one of the most expensive investments you will ever make, so being on the same page as your partner, or co-investor, is very important,” said Roux.
“We found navigating the process challenging… Those couples who have different personalities will definitely come up against some challenges.”
She cited Lightstone data from 2024, which shows that more than 70% of first-time property buyers are under 35, meaning many couples are forced to face money clashes early in their relationship.
She noted that conflicts often arise when different personalities collide. She said a high-stakes achiever may want a property they can flip quickly for profit, while a prepared protector is focused on a long-term family home. A spontaneous buyer may fall in love with a property that is out of budget, while a calculated planner delays with endless risk analysis.
A relaxed planner may want to renovate immediately for comfort, while a generous guardian would prefer to save money in case family members need support.
Roux said the first step is self-awareness, which may help understand the root of the disagreement and turn it into a productive conversation.
“You must always keep the bigger picture in mind. I had a list of non-negotiables for our home because it’s ultimately where we want to retire one day. And my husband had his own list. We had to communicate constantly and compromise if needed to ensure we were both happy and that our individual needs contributed to our collective goal,” said Roux.
“Knowing our personalities helped us spread the load. Because I’m the meticulous planner, I took care of the budgets and communicating with the attorneys and ensuring the long-term finances were in order. My husband is more flexible and is very good at handling day-to-day logistics, like arranging the builders and the moving company. It just helped to know exactly what each person had to do and where our respective strengths lie.”
Roux emphasised the importance of teamwork, but also stressed that professional guidance is needed.
“It’s a partnership. If you work towards understanding one another, communicate openly, play to your strengths, and seek expert advice, you’re not just buying a house; you are building a stronger foundation for the rest of your lives together.”
