Fellow franchise housewives come through to support RHJ launch

Yours in gossip headed out to the launch of the Real Housewives of Joburg last Friday at Melrose Arch. The event really gave Shwa a content creator’s playground – it was beyond crowded.

 Shwa really thinks the organisers could have opted for another venue because the setup just gave press conference vibes.

What happened to a nice dinner setup? It would have been so much cosier.

Perhaps you guys could learn a thing or two from the other franchises of the reality show.

 Sonia Mbele, babe, where was the budget after a three-year hiatus? One would expect you to come back with a bang. You started this in Mzansi after all but clearly you’ve dropped the ball.

 Sonia, who is the producer extraordinaire, saw it fit for her to make a grand entrance and pray for us as if we were at a church service. Not that Shwa is against prayer but if we wanted to go to church we would have done so.

Perhaps you should invest your prayers to your son, who is or was in a toxic relationship.

 It was very refreshing to see fellow franchise housewives come through and support the others. Shwa spotted Real Housewives of Cape Town stars Mrs Leo and Rooksie. Mrs Leo, what was going on with that dress of yours that had wings?

 Slee Ndlovu from Real Housewives of Durban looked very sexy in her outfit but it was very horrific… nice body, but dress no!

 By the way, Shwa is curious to know who was that mystery man you were with dressed as if it was Real Housewives of Lagos?

Shwa was so agitated because nobody really knew who the host of the launch was. At some point it was the beautiful Naledi M. Just out of concern, why would you call us to watch something live when we can do it in the comfort of our homes? What about Shwa’s stomach
 (isdima sesisu) making us go hungry and stuff?

 Is the new season the Lebo Jojo Mokoena and Lethabo Lejoy Mathatho show because the first episode was just about them?

Shwa is very proud of you, Lebo, for leaving that ex-husband of yours. I was really proud of you when you said it’s good to date people your age because, no hun, you deserve only, the best. Lejoy’s dress was giving financially overstretched vibes and Shwa does not really want to dwell much on the Brazilian Butt Lift (BBL)because, wow, people would say I’m mean. Anyways, it’s good to hear you have your own tea like all the other celebrities out there.

 Why are all the housewives seeing a need to have gusbands (gay husbands/friends)?

Is Leon now going to be Ruan2.0 or what?

 Cyan Boujee’s BBL is coming out right now, it looks better in person, not so botched up.

 Shwa should’ve known that something was up when she saw Londie London walking with a bodyguard. Clearly the new man is protecting you. Shwa is not going to say much but don’t make the same mistake twice. Men are men, and they’ll move on to the next nyash.

 Faith Nketsi looked yummy in a white gown with stunning detail, and it looked as if she skipped her white wedding for the launch. Honey child, when will you serve us some bars again?

 Shwa also spotted Phindile Gwala, Nicole Watson, Thobekile Mdlalose, Keabetswe Marema and Mamus Koka.

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