Cyril’s American Safari – from humiliation to hallucination
Our beloved President Cyril Ramaphosa has returned from his glorious pilgrimage to the land of cheeseburgers, where he grovelled before the Orange Oom, Donald Trump himself. And he dubs it a triumph! Cyril’s letter from the president’s desk reads like a love note penned by a smitten schoolboy.
Cyril’s “diverse delegation” – a sprinkling of BEE tokens amid the usual suspects – trotted out to convince Uncle Sam that South Africa isn’t that kind of African country. You know, the one where we occasionally remember to burn a farm or two for nostalgia’s sake. But fear not!
Cyril assured Trump that the “genocide” of white farmers is just a pesky rumour spread by fringe groups. And let’s not forget the G20 handover. Cyril, ever the gracious host, will pass the baton to Trump like a relay runner handing a grenade. “Here, mlungu, you deal with Brics now.” But the real kicker?
Inviting Trump’s cronies to “explore opportunities” here. Simply put, “Come strip our minerals, privatise our water, and call it “partnership”!
Mandela’s ghost weeps.
