Reality TV shows like Uthando Nes’thembu have played a huge role in normalising polygamy.
For those who do not practice culture, these shows have made them want to know more about what really goes on in such marriages.
In the past seasons of Uthando Nesthembu, we have all witnessed the problems that come with being in such marriages where men just make decisions alone.
There are people who have left polygamous marriages and have said they fell in love with the idea. Like in any other relationship or normal marriage at first it is all bliss, but as time goes on it gets dull.
To be honest, polygamy has been sensationalised and what people see from afar is not real.
Polygamy has been part of African culture for many years, and nobody ever made a big deal out of it. These days, it has become a morally acceptable practice and a trend.
Let’s admit that social media is a powerful tool for manipulating the way people think or view certain things. This same tool has played a major role in influencing people to assume that polygamy is the next big thing.
Social media basically influences people with a lot of things including fashion and gadgets. The problem is that people do not have the foresight of the latest trends and everyone seems to follow suit.
In polygamy, there are people however, who have the foresight on the reality of it. Women nowadays are very hyper-independent, and they are starting to want to choose life on their own terms.
For me, there is both baseless and non-baseless in-fashion foresight when it comes to such relationships or rather marriages with women. These women also have knowledge that most men fail to commit to one woman their entire lives, so they try to leverage the situation.
By doing this, they agree to such and try to build a home with more people, so they can give men the ability to “cheat” formally without feeling guilty about it.
On the other hand, these women want to give their husbands the space to be accountable to hold the fort and understand that decisions have consequences.
We live among women who do not want to do what is deemed normal chores every day, out of obligation and these women want their space.
With wanting their own me time without a nagging husband, they also long for a partnership, which is why they prefer polygamy because they don’t want to be single.
This is not such a bad idea if you think about it, because men can be very demanding at times and irritating.
From what we have seen from afar, polygamy may be associated with high rates of domestic or verbal violence and psychological distress. It is as if men have been encouraged to get into polygamy, and even if the first wife says no, they still go ahead and do it.
One thing men should know is that you need to be clear right from the start if you want a polygamous marriage or not, and know that your pockets need to be deep.
Let’s be honest, you can’t want two wives when you can barely afford one. No woman in their right mind would want to suffer for their entire life.
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