The Great Tsek-xodus a detox
Oh, bless the winds of change – or, in this case, the Omni Air International jetstream – for delivering South Africa’s most unexpected miracle: 49 fewer racists clogging our national arteries. Move over, Cape Town water crisis; the real drought we’re celebrating is the sudden evaporation of a plane load of folks who’ve apparently mistaken Donald Trump’s Twitter feed for the Promised Land.
Forty-nine Afrikaners, clutching their trommels and a curious sense of victimhood, boarded a flight to Washington, DC, courtesy of a man whose hair rivals their biltong in texture. One imagines their asylum application: Reason for relocation: Too much Ubuntu, not enough Maga.
But, the rest of us are popping koeksisters in jubilation. Who knew equality could be so… self-filtering? The “Great Tsek”, as we’re dubbing it, isn’t just a migration – it’s a national detox.
We’ve shed a Braai Brigade’s worth of “persecuted” souls, off to bask in Trump’s America, where their nostalgia for apartheid can harmonise with his nostalgia for the 1950s. So, here’s to the 49: May your Washington welcome include a crash course in irony (land of the free, built on stolen land!), and may your absence make SA’s heart grow fonder.
As for the rest of us? We’ll be here, relearning how to share a country without rolling our eyes.
