I believe that the underlying cause of the human catastrophe we face today is not due to climate change, wars, inequality, or moral decay in societies, but the lack of genuine leadership and mentorship.
Genuine leadership and mentorship are key requirements not only in politics but in all areas including corporate, social, societal, among others. The human race is under siege by what Dr Elijah Maswanganyi and a few other authors refer to as “leadership bankruptcy”, the state of complete lack of leadership quality.
We see leaders failing in the public eye because of unethical behaviour, abuse of official positions, and clashes with the law. There is an urgent need to raise fresh blood of leaders who can overcome human shortcomings and earthly greed in their areas of responsibility, and this can only be achieved through quality leadership and mentoring.
Most people don’t understand the purpose of leading others. In most cases, those in positions of leadership confuse leadership for control. True leadership is rooted in humility, eagerness to listen to others as they might know more than you. Control is based on arrogance, self-centeredness, and dictatorship. True leaders seek to serve those they lead rather than be served.
Professor William James of Harvard University once stated that “compared to what we ought to be, we are only half awake”, meaning that we are only making use of a fraction of our physical and mental capabilities. He continued to add that we live far within our limits, implying that though we have a lot to offer we are not often fully energised physically and mentally.
Leaders have an important role to play in unleashing the potential of the people they lead. True leaders help their followers to reach their full potential, instead of exploiting them for personal gain.
John Wanamaker, the founder of the American chain stores, confessed that he learnt it was foolish to scold. He said he had enough trouble overcoming his own limitations without worrying about others level of intelligence. This means we should acknowledge our shortcomings as individuals, and we should allow others to be wrong without trying to change them by scolding them.
The late Maya Angelou, one of my favourite philosophers, in her most famous quote passage said: “I learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” I know this quote has been contextualised by many, but I want to use it to teach, correct, and guide those we are privileged to lead.
In conclusion, I want to leave you with this challenge: before you open your mouth to say something, first think about how they will feel about what you are about to say. It doesn’t matter how correct you think you are or how wrong you think they are. Negative criticism is
futile as it puts a person on the defensive and usually makes them strive to justify themselves at all costs.
In marriage do not be harsh when correcting your spouse and don’t allow the correction to take away their dignity.
As a parent don’t preach to your children about their wrongs to the point of eroding their confidence and esteem, rather caution them about how their wrong behaviour could hinder them from attaining what they love most.
My best French friend and influential speaker Luc Dumont, recently said to me: “Jeff there are many trees around us but we put our eyes on the fruits only.”
- Dr Khumalo is a family educational psychologist and director of Clips and Wellness Institute
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I don’t know how much it cost to get your help I saw your interview with Mpho Sithole ndiye ndathobeka emoyeni mzuzwana 🙏