Johannesburg – I do not regard myself as a royal watcher.
However, like an average South African, I am titillated by the shenanigans of royalty and their purported blue bloodedness.
Whether it’s abaThembu King Dalindyebo’s smoking habits, the majestic powers of Modjadji the Rain Queen or the succession battles that have sent heirs in hiding, I’m tickled.
However, the tribulations of the House of Windsor have been fodder for the penny press and tabloids for centuries.
The House of Windsor is, of course, the reigning royal house of the UK and the other Commonwealth realms.
The world was held spellbound this week when television mogul Oprah Winfrey got an exclusive interview with the former Duke and Duchess of Sussex to hang some dirty laundry at Buckingham Palace.
Known to us as Merghan Markle and Prince Harry, the couple has shed all royal perks in exchange of man-on the- street existence in the US.
Markle is, of course, the American actress who ditched Hollywood glitz for the trappings of Buckingham Palace in London.
Unfortunately, the couple did not live happily ever after. Following the interview with Oprah, we have come to know that Markle’s non-whiteness was a bone of contention when Harry put a ring on her finger.
When she fell pregnant with a potential heir to the throne, the royal rumour mill was concerned about the colour of the baby even before he was born.
The possibility of a dark hue was a bridge too far for the racist royalty machine that runs the palace.
While Harry’s son, Archie, is not even close to being king in his lifetime unless for whatever reason lightning strikes and kills 95% of possible heirs.
Harry himself is not close to the throne as his father, Prince Charles, and his brother, William, lurk in the horizon although Charles has made it clear he holds no such ambitions. Prince Charles notoriously divorced Harry’s mother, Princess Diana, who died tragically in a car crash while frolicking with an African, Dodi Alfayed.
Back to Harry and Markle, the couple has sought to paint themselves as besieged by the Firm and they opened up to Oprah about the strictures of royalty that “forced” them to abandon the trappings. So hostile was their stay in the palace that they left the UK on a one-way ticket to the US and were lucky to get accommodation from television superstar Tyler Perry.
Markle revealed that at some stage she even considered suicide, such was the abuse she received from her in-laws and their lackeys.
The British tabloid did not escape opprobrium from the couple for its incessant haggling of the marriage and insinuation that Markle was a threat to the throne.
For his part, Harry said he still loved his grandmother but felt he had chosen between his beloved Markle and royalty. He chose his wife and is now fulfilled when he happily takes his son to the beach like other doting parents.
The Firm has cut off their emoluments and security detail and they are now on their own although you can rest assured that they have not truly entered the ranks of ordinary man on the street.
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