Valentine’s Day has become a hype over the past few years, but the joy is not necessarily experienced by everyone and may leave some people feeling excluded and lonely, sexologist Dr Caroline Webb said in an interview with Sunday World.
In preparation for Valentine’s Day, which is on Tuesday, Webb said there should be no pressure felt on the part of singles, ending up dating someone simply to have a “Valentine” together. She warned lovers to shy away from celebrating the day with strangers.
“Don’t just get into something for the sake of trying to spoil someone or be spoilt. Single people should not worry to celebrate the day with just one person. My suggestion would be to get a group of single people together and to celebrate the fact that they are single.
“I would much rather be single and be among friends and celebrate the fact that I have a good circle of friends and we bond.”
She said the best way to prepare and celebrate Valentine’s day was to connect with your inner self and celebrate what you love most, with or without a companion.
For those in love relationships, Webb said the day was not only about eating and drinking but also engaging in other activities that may be appealing to partners.
She wonders if partners in difficult relationships may think it may be appropriate to attempt to spoil each other.
“There is no quick fix for a challenged relationship on Valentine’s Day. I think that Valentine’s Day will just mask it, like putting a plaster on your wound for the moment.
“However, when you take the plaster off then the wound will still be there.
“My view is that we must work on a relationship every day. In relationships there are new challenges with advantages and disadvantages. How they are dealt with varies from one person to the next.”
“Valentine’s Day is about bonding just like any other day, about having fun, savouring the moment and creating memories.”
She also warned that sex should not be the only consideration because if it is, then the act borders on selfishness.
“That’s just about getting another body count and that is not the right way to do things,” she said.
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